Initially I was introduced to Mehdi (through my partner at the time). I liked him right away. He was kind, grounded, playful and I felt safe to talk with him about anything. He was not afraid to get to the root of any issue and was creative in his approach to working through mental and emotional blocks. He gave my partner and I a touch exercise, which proved to be a very powerful tool, teaching me to ask for exactly what my body wanted and needed, in a timed and controlled environment. It was difficult at first, as asking for what I needed from others had been one of my biggest challenges, but with practice I was able to communicate my needs / desires with ease, and all of my relationships have improved as a result of what I learned.
After couples councelling I was curious to continue seeing Mehdi with sessions focused on The Touching Cure, so we set up some appointments and worked one-on-one for 5 sessions.
During my time with him, I was able to practice tuning into my body with more awareness of the feelings, emotions and physical sensations I was experiencing. He helped me become more able to recognize and voice not only my needs and desires, but also my boundaries and my body’s “yes” and “no” responses. He gave me tools to integrate, validation, understanding and encouragement about what was coming up for me, and he helped me identify deeper wounds and beliefs that were no longer serving me. All of this work helped to release old programming that was keeping me stuck in destructive and painful cycles. Since our sessions I have felt more connected to myself and others, more free and playful, and I have been experiencing deeper levels of trust, confidence and joy in all areas of my life.
Mehdi’s intuition, compassion and ability to hold space for me while I was clearing out debris and learning to step into my Power, were such incredible gifts. His focus, awareness and insight are blessings and I would not hesitate to recommend him as a guide / healer / teacher for anyone wanting to dig deeper into their own self-awareness, and what drives their body, mind and emotions.
During our four sessions I laughed with delight more than I cried. I felt entirely safe with Mehdi.
This makes my heart sing. And what could be better?
Well, the next session!
This time some fear and tears suddenly erupted and I had a faint, then clearer flash of being struck on the head. In fact, I was tiny and my skull was still soft. All I had to do was to honour my present reality and to ask Mehdi to touch me in just the way I wanted. Low and behold- the flat place on the top of my head that has always drawn my attention was changing shape with the massage movements I requested. I laughed as I told Mehdi he had unflattened my head and, indeed, the top of my head is now gently rounded! The other aspect of that old cellular memory releasing is that I no longer suffer from an underlying tension and fear of being struck from above that has plagued me since early infancy. My soul is at peace.
So, if I am asked what it is like to be a client of Mehdi’s, I will say ‘It’s wonderful….let yourself experience it!’
I believe you will receive the magnificence of being wholly present and delighted by yourself and this life.
Imagine yourself in your most exposed and vulnerable state. Every raw emotion, human flaw and orifice is hanging out there to be seen. Standing on the precipice of self-implosion from shame. Then, your witness looks you in the eye, sees you, and speaks of your beauty and courage. Instead of being dashed to the rocks, you are soaring. To be seen, really seen at such a vulnerable level, and at that moment, instead of what you imagine – the person running out of the room screaming, they embrace you with love and validation. It is the greatest gift you can give yourself.
I recently attended and came back from an Erotic Massage/ Intimacy Healing week long class. “Came back from,” is an apropos description. It felt as if I was on another planet. That I had travelled to a distant land and experienced things I didn’t know possible. Even within myself, I met parts of me from which I had shied away. We were encouraged to challenge ourselves to move from a place of conformity and safety to a new edge. Get out of our comfort zones and to open up to more of what we want, what we truly desire and are capable of. That would require me to leave my private and conservative self behind. Was I ready? It had taken me a couple of years to get here. It’s not for beginners.
Through the week, there were a series of exercises to build trust as a group and to get to know ourselves more. We established clear boundaries, practiced voicing our desires, visited our shadow, and played with our fantasies. We were asked questions like, “What would make this more pleasurable?” And “What have you not dared to ask for?” Ugh, How do I answer that when it is hard enough to admit I enjoy touch? Slowly, as I listened to myself, the answers came. And came and came. Oh, my gosh, really, I could ask for that? No way, how embarrassing. Maybe? The group encouraged me to, “Go for it, anything.”
Holy shit, I went for it. Naively, I was focusing on my physical body – exploring new sensory edges and ways to be touched. I no longer wanted to hide behind the fig leaf. What I didn’t expect was the emotional healing that would take place. After a bit of erotic gymnastics, I was there on that precipice. I had bared it all physically and was on the edge of a shame attack. The urge was to close up or to put on the brakes, resisting the possibility to take it further. Could I also risk emotionally?
I could’ve left it at that. A lot of play, laughter and new found pleasures. But nooooo . . . very slowly, there was another need that began to take hold. After a while I couldn’t shake it no matter how I tried. Just thinking about it my eyes welled up with tears and my gut twisted in knots. The urge to shut down and hide was still strong. Like a flower right before the final blossom, shrivels up. Over the years, I had learned to ask for emotional support from my closest life companions, so the feeling was familiar, I knew that freedom came from speaking rather than shutting down.
I don’t even recall how I worded it. Astounded that anyone could even hear my soft voice. “Desirable? Am I desirable?”
No answer. It seemed like it took forever. The practitioner repositioned himself to establish mindful eye contact. Clearly reassuring me that he understood the importance of this question.
The tears streamed down my face. “Sara, you are desirable.” The attention and heart connection was extremely powerful! He spoke with such a tender and loving voice. It felt genuine and heartfelt. Being so seen and still desirable. What a gift!
Most women want to feel desired. Or as a client of mine said, to know she is “fuckable.” That doesn’t mean they want to fuck a lot of people. Only to be desired that much.
Sadness washed over me. Why is this so rare? Why does it take 25 or 50 years before one can receive loving touch that strips away our armoring, our oppressive cultural messages about our bodies and the restraints of erotic touch. Why isn’t this an integral part of standard therapy? Why do we have to go underground and feel like we are part of the black market to experience sexual healing? We have lived long enough behind the veil of secrecy and shame. Let our healing be shame-free.
I am thankful for having risked taking this class. Having the support to listen to my inner voice about how I want to be touched which enabled me to climb to new heights of pleasure. Then in my vulnerable state of exposure, to risk even further, be held with loving and supportive words – such tenderness and validation.
The more vulnerable one becomes, the greater the reward of intimacy.
Having been fortunate enough to do this life-changing work with Mehdi, I can honestly say that this seemingly small piece had, and continues to have, the greatest impact for me. There is not a facet of my life untouched by having found my No, and the same can be said, perhaps even more so, for my Yes. Truly a gift.